Day 6:

The Hookah Hang

Song: Who are y8u?

You’re late.

What are you smoking?

Never mind. Give me a hit, and keep up.

So… you sat on your ass all day yesterday and now you’re feeling a little frisky eh? Fine, hows about if your favorite Tour Guide (I am your favorite, right?) hooks you up with a mixed drink and some premium shisha tobacco at the hottest hookah bar in town?

No, you should *not* smoke. Any of you. It’s *bad* for you.

I mean, look at the information. It’s astonishingly terrible for you.

But it’s Wonderland, so just…this… once.

Now, ‘The Shroom’ is a cool hang, but the owner? A little quirky. Okay, a lot quirky. And they are *super* nosey. SUPER NOSEY.

If you want it to go easy, just tell them. Really, just spill the beans and they’ll move on.

That’s it. I know nothing. Nothing!
Page 15 of The Guide Book. Really? Why did we even make that Guide Book?

It’s cool. Just stay calm and listen to today’s song WHO ARE Y8U? And no questions, I’m not telling you anything.

✰  Play Me

✰ Read Me

Who Are Y8u?
Music + Lyrics by Kevin Saunders Hayes

Delicious as a pasta fazool
No one can tell me better
As Sexy as a new tattoo
Predictable as the weather

Mysterious as a Fu Man Chu
And others have tried it’s true
No way you ever gonna hide or misconstrue
Now tell me honey who are you?

I see we have a lot to revue
I’m putting it all together
I’ll smell you saying something untrue
So tell me honey who are you

You can hum it on a big kazoo
That part I’m leaving up to you
This little talk is way overdue
Now tell me honey who are you

Ah, come on and tell me, who are you

Who who who who, who who who are
Who who who who, who who who are

You wanna draw a picture that’s okay
Or you can sing a song’s another way

Karate or some cool Kung fu
Whatever is your jam
Come on
Remind you honey tell me who are

Blow it on a slide trombone
Louder’s always better
Ya gotta let it go now honey who are
You know you’ll never keep it secret from me
Now come on honey who are you

You can tell me, you can tell me, you really can tell me

A taco or a little fondue
Will make it go much better
Some people get a new hairdo
Some people write a letter

Come on baby dry your eyes
Oh stop it grab a tissue
Before the cock crows doodlie-doo
You’ll tell me honey who are you

Come on now you just give it away
Like some bad Christmas sweater
No matter what the holiday
Come on and tell me honey who are you

No matter what you’re feeling today
Tomorrow you’ll be better
Before you hit that pillow tonight
You’ll tell me honey who are you

Ah come on and tell me, who are you

You think that you know, well at the present at least
Exactly who you are now since all the shrinking has ceased
please explain if you can, if you think that you might
I want the little details cuz they might throw some light
On the what, when and how and maybe, baby the when
Of how this whole thing got started, who you think is your friend
And who you think is a jerk. Is this all deja vu?
So enough about me, tell me more about you

Delicious as a pizza pie
Or mushroom bar-b-q
They do it out in Timbuktu
Come on and tell me honey who are you

Mysterious as someone who has
A different point of view
Mysterious as a Fu Man Chu
You knew that there would come a time
To face your Waterloo

You know you’re gonna feel much better
Come on and tell me honey – who are you

Pro Tips from the Staff

Today @ The Club House

Day 6
Get a buddy. Trust me. You need an alibi.
And you can always turn on them first to get a lesser sentence.

The Club House ain’t talkin’.

Really. You can tell the truth there.

And your buddy too.

Yeah, your buddy’s cool. You? You I’ve suspected all along.

And we do NOT allow that flavored tobacco crap in here.

Okay, that’s it for today. Meet back here tomorrow.

Now go… Go get an alibi, uh… buddy.

And don’t be late. We gotta schedule.