Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE],

I know I just wrote to you on Wednesday. And no, I am not that needy (not all the time). And no, no, no we are not offering any NFTs of… anything! Seriously.

Then why the hell am I writing? Because it’s Release Day! 🎉. Today With What PorPoise leaves home and goes out into the world.

“But, dude.’” you say, “You already hit us with With What PorPoise on Wednesday.” Yes, I did. Thank you for remembering.

Look, Release Day is a big deal. It’s special like ‘National Donut Day’ or the finals of the Heavy Metal Knitting Contest. And I want us to be together. Not that close… but together.

Don’t like to read? No problem. Click the video to hear this email read to you by Victoria.
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And I come baring gifts. You got the track early… NOW you’re gonna get the Music Video of With What PorPoise before anyone else! You know, before all the little people. Yes, because you’re special, that’s why. Yes, you are….

That’s it… You should totally be more excited.

Fine. Be that way. HAPPY RELEASE DAY!

Dude, are you coming back on National Donut Day? What the hell’s in it for me?

Yes. Yes I am. Think ‘bear claws’.

Bottomline it for me

  • The Heavy Metal Knitting Contest should be in the Olympics
  • I wonder if you can buy the stuff they knit?
  • I’m totally writing a new album about the Heavy Metal Knitting Contest
  • Is it ‘knit one, purl two’, or the other way around?

That’s it. I’m not gonna get all mushy.

See ya’ ~ Kevin

p.s. Our website spools its own yarn. The socials smell like sheep.
p.p.s. Whenever you’re ready, here are some more cool ways you can play along:

  1. Subscribe to our YouTube Channel. You think you get stuff early here? The YT gets it even earlier (and we could use a few more people, okay?)
  2. Like us on Facebook, because we’re a little needy, okay? Just one mouse click will help our self esteem.
  3. Visit the Shop. You don’t have to buy anything. Just have a look around. The boss likes it if we look busy.
  4. Share the newsletter. I know you know other people that would like our wacky hi-jinx. Don’t bogart the fun. We got room for one (or 2 or 3) more.
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