I was looking for that special headline. The one that would grab your attention and make your index finger twitch with anticipation of clicking your computer mouse or tapping your phone to dive into the magic that is our weekly quality email time together.

Instead I ended up going down the rabbit hole of “amazing facts” and after totally burning through 30 or 40 minutes that I’ll never get back, I ended up with three possible candidates worthy of grabbing your attention.

1. A butt is a real unit of measurement for a cask of wine. A buttload is about 108 Imperial gallons.
2. Grace Jones has a lifetime ban from Disney World.
3. Sloths are the only mammals that don’t fart.

I had sloths in the subject line almost until I hit send. And Grace Jones now lives rent free in my head cuz I’m imagining all the things she might have done to The Mouse in order to get banned… for life.

And what does any of this have to do with how amazingly well ticket sales are going for our four limited engagement performances of Vox Lumiere Metropolis in Los Angeles?

You know, the ones on…

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 30th
Lumiere Cinema – Beverly Hills, CA
7:30pm & 9:30pm

AND

THURSDAY, MAY 1st
The Frida Cinema – Santa Ana, CA
6:30pm & 9:00pm

Not a whole buttload, but when I do figure out what Grace did at Disney, we are totally going to do that at our next show.

Did you know that people fart more on airplanes? That was another one I was considering, but I figured if I included too many fart facts you might get the wrong idea about me. Or it would just confirm what you already suspected.

Well ticket sales *are* going great. And honestly, if you want some of those VIP tickets you better get off your butt and get clicking. I had to order more CDs today just to make sure there were enough available for all the VIPs *and* we had a few for the merch table.

The other attention grabbing headline I considered for a moment was “How can you tell a Good Robot from an Evil Robot?” It’s no “Grace Jones” but there’s a lot to unpack there. Sure, that little Roomba is cute and all, but do you really want to turn your back on it? I mean, its whole reason for being is to suck things inside its robot belly and dispose of them… quietly.

Just sayin’.

Well, don’t you worry that little carbon based life form of a brain any longer. We got you covered. Check out our Vox Lumiere public service announcement “How to tell a Good Robot from an Evil Robot”

You’re welcome.

I’d love to stay and chat, but the Roomba keeps banging at the door and those whirring sounds are starting to freak me out.

That’s it. I’m not gonna get all mushy.

See ya ~ Kevin

p.s. The website just reminded me that I could have lead with “If you measure the internet in horsepower, you’d need 50 million horsepower to keep it running.” The socials also wanted me to add that “The term “Wi-Fi” was coined by a marketing firm, Interbrand, as a play on words of “Hi-Fi” (high fidelity), not as an abbreviation for “Wireless Fidelity”.