News & Resources

Wonderland sucks at keeping secrets 🤫🐰

Wonderland sucks at keeping secrets 🤫🐰

Hi {{ subscriber.first_name | strip | default: "there" }}, Wonderland sucks at keeping secrets. If you ever start a sentence in the WonderHood with, “Now keep this under your hat….”, you might as well walk right into Western Union and send a telegram out to your...

Wonderland: The birthplace of Summer🌞😎🐰

Wonderland: The birthplace of Summer🌞😎🐰

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], Ah, summer. That magical time when we break out our favorite pair of Bermuda shorts, proudly show off our achingly white legs and stand in 3-hour long lines at the airports while munching on a $17 snack bar scone. Mmm, scones. Summer?...

The Egg is asking for it 🍳🐰

The Egg is asking for it 🍳🐰

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], Humpty Dumpty smiled contemptuously. "When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said, in rather a scornful tone, "it means just what I choose it to mean—neither more nor less." "The question is," said Alice, "whether you can make words mean so many...

Sleeping on the job 😴🐰

Sleeping on the job 😴🐰

Hi {{ subscriber.first_name | strip | default: "there" }}, In the version you’ve been told, the Mouse gets a bad rap. “That” story makes the Mouse out to be some kind of dope who comes to a party only to sleep all over everything (and every body). Yeah, sure the Mouse...

Not a good bet 🍄🐛

Not a good bet 🍄🐛

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], Mushrooms. You wouldn’t think you could build an empire with those tiny bits of fungus, but you’d be wrong. Apparently, mushrooms can make you rich. And they did make The Hookah Dude rich. Rich beyond your wildest dreams. My dreams are...

The Queen sucks at gardening 🌹🙄

The Queen sucks at gardening 🌹🙄

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], The Queen sucks at gardening. It’s true and she’s very sensitive about it. How do you think the whole “Off with their heads!” thing got started? Well, it started with daisies. Who doesn’t like daisies? The Queen liked daisies and, this isn’t...

There’s no crying in Wonderland 😿🙄

There’s no crying in Wonderland 😿🙄

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], People sometimes say to me, “You know, you’re a little snarky.” To which I say, “Shut up!”, or “Who asked you?, or “Says who?” But after I say that, I say, “Thanks.” Why? Don’t be a dope. You think this comes easy? Okay actually, it does...

A Hot Tea Piñata ☕︎ 😳

A Hot Tea Piñata ☕︎ 😳

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], Wonderlandians love Cinco de Mayo. They do! They have no idea what it means, but they like the colors, and the music and the piñatas and it gives them a chance to put salt on the rim of their tea cups and well... you get it. Wonderlandians...

Learn the swear words first 🤬

Learn the swear words first 🤬

Hi {{ subscriber.first_name | strip | default: "there" }}, You’re anxious. I get it. You’re about to go off to a foreign land, and what if you get there and want a bite of "Eat Me Cake" or a sip of "Drink Me Juice" or, heaven forbid, a steaming hot cup of tea…. and...

Rocking the Wonder-hood🤘🏼🎸

Rocking the Wonder-hood🤘🏼🎸

  Hi {{ subscriber.first_name | strip | default: "there" }}, We like the rock and roll in the Wonder-hood. Did you think you were gonna read that when you got up this morning? Well it’s true. We like music. Some music. Well, we usually listen to whatever the...

Hey, I’m talkin’ to you 🐰📣

Hey, I’m talkin’ to you 🐰📣

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], I gotta bone to pick with you. The day fast approaches. That special day when we celebrate the beauty, magic and wisdom of the majestic rabbit. There are parades. Your Mom buys you new clothes. Baskets overflow with jelly beans. Games are...

Great Caesar’s Ghost Batman 👻 !

Great Caesar’s Ghost Batman 👻 !

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], “Great Caesar’s Ghost!” This is what editor Perry White used to scream from his office at The Daily Planet when he was looking for Clark Kent (who was probably off on some other planet doing Superman stuff). You may ask yourself, “What do...

April Fool’s in the Wonder-hood 🤡 ?

April Fool’s in the Wonder-hood 🤡 ?

Hi [INSERT NAME HERE], People (creatures, plants, animals, anthropomorphic tea cups, etc) in the Wonder-hood don’t get April Fool’s Day. To them, it’s just another day in the Hood. They really don’t get the days of the week either, but never mind. The origin of April...

Wanna know a secret 🔐 ?

Wanna know a secret 🔐 ?

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], Things aren't what they seem. I’m writing this February 14th, 2022 at 9:21pm♥️. We’re not going to get bogged down in why I’m writing to you on Valentine’s Day, instead of being on a hot date with my beautiful wife, but like I said... things...

Who are you? 🤔

Who are you? 🤔

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], Time to reflect. I’m not going to do that, but I thought that there’s probably somebody out there that has done it, and that maybe they could give us all a book report or something about it. You have our email. But… dear reader (see how I’m...

National Barbie Day 👱🏻‍♀️

National Barbie Day 👱🏻‍♀️

Barbie in the sky with diamonds Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], I know. You’ve had “Addicted to Love” stuck in your head all week, right? “The lights are on…” (please make it stop). So you know with a headline like National Barbie Day, that I sat at the computer for a good...

Might as well face it 🥰

Might as well face it 🥰

Face it already! Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], And welcome to another chapter of my every-now-and-then series of deeply personal and revealing essays I call “What the hell were you thinking?” Sit down. It’s just a paragraph of behind-the-scenes dirt on why I wrote /...

Follow The Rabbit 🐰

Follow The Rabbit 🐰

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], Look, you saw The Matrix, right (the new one’s okay, not great). Ready Player One (the book was better)? Free Guy? Tron? What do all these geeky sci fi movies have in common other than taking hard earned money out of my pocket? Virtual...

Missed Valentine’s Day 💝 ?  AGAIN…

Missed Valentine’s Day 💝 ? AGAIN…

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], It’s the Wednesday between Valentine’s Day and Presidents Day. The day you’re adding a note to your Google calendar that a new toilet brush and plunger ensemble are not gonna cut it as Valentine’s Day gifts (no matter how much you may need...

02/02/2022 22:22:22 🕑

02/02/2022 22:22:22 🕑

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], Let’s just take a minute, shall we? At 10:22 (and 22 seconds) today it will be 02/02/2022 22:22:22. That’s it. Do with it what you will but, I think it’s a once in forever thing, right? Pretty cool. It’s also Groundhog’s Day. Which, of...

You are so gonna rock Karaoke tonight 🎶🎤

You are so gonna rock Karaoke tonight 🎶🎤

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], I totally hooked you up 2 whole days before the release of With What PorPoise (the new single from your favorite immersive concert experience, AliƧin). “Yeah, yeah, thanks and everything”, you say. “But I’m still mumbling the lyrics. You...

Heavy Metal Knitting 🤘🏼

Heavy Metal Knitting 🤘🏼

Hi [FIRST NAME GOES HERE], I know I just wrote to you on Wednesday. And no, I am not that needy (not all the time). And no, no, no we are not offering any NFTs of… anything! Seriously. Then why the hell am I writing? Because it’s Release Day! 🎉. Today With What...

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